“Being an everyday mom is not for everyone “
Is it a thing to be a mom, a big thing, is bigger than we ever thought. And no one tells you by real what it means; or even if they told you, you couldn’t really believe that is so hard.
I mean, is beyond comparison the blessing and the beauty of having kids. Is happines that fills your house , love that fills your heart. You have now the reason of life , you’r having your all.
The thing is , they are just some little humans that are starting their path in life . It’s like a blank paper that needs to be filled with something. Is our duty to fill this paper, and depends on us how it will look at the end.
They are experimenting everything , to see what’s happening. They are having strong feelings and don’t know how to manage .
And for us , this could cause a lot of mind blowing, hard to control our anger and we start to act in a way that is causing them pain , and us as well.
How to control your anger and be more calm parent?
Here are a few tips:
1. Whatever is happening , firts of all remember : IS NOT ABOUT YOU. Is about them , their feelings theyr emotions that they don’t understand and didn’t learned yet how to control. They are not doind this to you on purpose, even if it’s seems so.
2. Remember that anger begind in the brain. It’s what we think that makes us angry, and we can rethink it in a more positive thoughts.
3. More often there can be other things that makes you angry , and it happens just that your kid is interfering with this event. Take a bit of time to analyse and understand what is the real problem, what is on the root of your anger. Could be that you are very tired , anxious, worried for something; you feel disrespected, unappreciated for what you do. You are irritated, pressed by time.
There are many reasons why you could get angry. So first :
– recognise the anger;
– try to be nice with you;
– don’t take it too seriously. Most probably you will laugh about this after years;
– this is just a stage on child’s life , it will pass as it comes;
– try not to educate or discipline when you are angry, it’s time to emphasise. When you are nervous you tend to punish your child in a way which you will regret ;
– do not send kids to time-out;
– Instead, you could take a time-out to wind down and reconect with your thoughts. There are a number of ideas how to take a time out in different surroundings and what to do to calm yourself;
– only after you feel in control of your feelings, you can try to resolve the problem , with a clear mind and a clear vision.
4. In the end, it really helps not to give so much importance to daily irritations with kids. Breathe deep and don’t think too far in the future. Focuse on present .
Reconnect with your child . It’s the only thing that matters. Focus on your bond and try not to weaken this bond with punishments and lessons when it’s not the case .
Just love your kids, and they will be your best friends.
